Letters to Tender Heart

Letters to Tender Heart

Leading with Feeling

Dear Heart:

What’s going on with you lately?

What happened to your confidence? It seems like every step forward recently has been a struggle, and I’m growing weary of watching you second guess yourself at every step.

You always used to trust your instincts. You knew exactly what you wanted, and even if you felt fear with the unknown, you would chase your dreams, your hopes, and your wants – and you were relentless until you achieved. Until you conquered. Until you learned what you wanted.

But lately, you falter. Hesitate. You resist…It’s almost like you’re resisting your true nature, because you’re not sure if that’s good enough anymore. I don’t really know what happened along the way, Heart, but it’s almost as if you suddenly started to buy into all the messages flying around us.

For so long, you’d come up with these ideas. You’d tell me about them, we’d come up with a good plan to manage working on them, and we’d get busy. People would naysay, they’d tell you that we’d fail, or they’d say we weren’t good enough, or even that we weren’t smart enough. I’d be the one to check in with that, and when I sometimes thought people had a point, I would falter. That’s where you came in.

You were always the one to keep going. You would tell me to ignore all those messages, and chase after what we had agreed to, because we knew we came up with good ideas and you led the way for me. You led with feeling, intention, and your intuition. You always just knew.

People were always surprised by us when we achieved. I still don’t really understand why no one expected great things, because I always knew what you were capable of. I knew your greatness. Heart, I had a front row seat to it.

But when you started to slow down and really pay attention to those messages going on around us, you paused. You hesitated. And then you started to believe them. I felt like I was suddenly sucked up to the top of the bleachers at a big game, trying to scream down to you while you were defenseless on the field, and the crowd simply overpowered me. Heart, they drowned me out. You stopped hearing me cheer you on to lead the way. I think that’s when you stopped paying attention to your greatest strength, the building block of your confidence – Heart, it’s your intuition.

When you lead with your intuition, there’s no stopping you. You allow me to gently steer you in different directions when I come across a fact that can help us, and while I’m grateful to participate in that way, Heart, you’re always out in front. When you lead with feeling – that energy that only you can create – you can walk into a room and just own it. People stop and pay attention to that sort of thing, Heart.

I know it can be scary. It can be overwhelming to try to shove all those messages to one side and disregard them. I know how important those messages seem, because it’s so easy for me to get wrapped up into them too. That’s why you need to listen to me.

I’m behind you, Heart. All the way. I trust you, I have faith in you, and when we are in it together, I truly believe there is nothing we cannot do. Now I need you to do the same, but for your own sake. I need you take a big deep breath, look around, and remember what you’re capable of. Take inventory of what you’ve accomplished. Your process doesn’t have to be perfect, because it is already incredible. You just have to remember that.

You say to me, when I am second guessing and hesitating, to remember that there will always be fear. Fear helps to guide us, because it forces us to check in with ourselves, the choices we are wanting to make, and to really pause and evaluate, instead of blindly leaping. Yet, you also tell me to keep my fear in check. And then – then, my loveable Heart – you give me a good swift kick in the ass, and tell me to want “It” more than I fear.

So Heart, consider this letter my way of doing exactly that for you. Check in with whatever it is you’re afraid of. Evaluate it. Understand why it’s happening. And then act anyway. Act, move, run, jump, swing, swim, dance – really whatever, as long as you’re moving forward. Because you are amazing. You are already your own best expert, because your intuition leads us.

Please don’t ever forget that again.

I’m here, waiting. I’m waiting for that confidence. Trust yourself, Heart. You know what to do.

I love you,


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“This article was originally posted on the SHFT Blog

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